New Year’s Resolutions I Will (probably not) Keep

I will not let the gas light come on in the truck (Ironhide). Also, I will not keep driving when said light does come on.

Yeah, right. 2011 will likely be the year I’m stranded on the side of the highway out of fuel.

I will stop eating Nutella out of the jar with my finger when I’m grumpy.

In 2011, I will use a spoon.

I will stop dropping into the pet store that has all the cute baby rats. I am not that strong.

Well…. Maybe just to look….

I will not judge people.

Much. Except bad drivers, bad dressers, bad parents, bad… er, ok, this one may be hard to keep…

I will grow up and stop sleeping with stuffed animals.

Except Sir Loin and the Petite Sir Loin. And the other cows when LT Fromage is gone. But all others will stay out of the bed.

I will not use duct tape as a fashion item; even though it is designed for holding things together, the things held together should not be my pants.

I will learn to bake. And while doing so, I will try very, very hard not to catch the house on fire or add a little crunch to brownies with a splintered wooden spoon.

I will lose the last….

Oh forget it. No weight loss resolutions. I’ll mess that one up before I finish this post!

I will take a picture a day for 365 Days in Pictures.

Ok, I actually plan to really really try hard to do this one. Check out my new website devoted to my year in photos.

What are your resolutions?

Christmas Recap in Pictures

O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree....

Decorated with home made ornaments inspired by Country Living....

"The Cheese Nun" was opened and made me so glad.... (Thanks, LT Fromage!)

Then I opened this cow purse from "Mom" and from "Dad"

LT Fromage's stocking was overflowing with treats....

Left over turkey bones the ratinos did eat...

The dogs both got rawhides, despite being naughty....

Next year we'll save money and just give the cats all the paper....

Christmas oh-ten, you were such a good one. I hope all my readers had just as much fun!

Multiple Choice

Lack of recent posts has been due to

A) Taking a leave of absence from work to deal with my anxiety disorder

B) Hand feeding an 8 day old baby rat every 3-4 hours day and night

C) Cleaning cat pee off of the love seat

D) Screaming at the dog for unwrapping the gift “she got” for her daddy (That was FROM you, Erika, your name was in the FROM spot, not TO, D@MNITT)

E) Hanging cow Christmas lights in my cow kitchen (An early gift from LT Fromage, since he got to open one early… er, Erika opened it for him)

F) Winning the lottery

G) All of the above

H) All of the above except for F

If you answered H, you’re correct. I’m at home for a few weeks (maybe longer, if I qualify for short term disability). I wish we’d won the lotto, but alas, my recent activity has included no such luck. I’m supposed to be using this time to de-stress, however most of my time has been spent trying to undo the damages caused by our four-legged kids and playing wet-nurse to a little boy we call Florian Geyer who’s little eyes and ears aren’t even open yet. (Ok, the baby isn’t stressful. I actually kind of like all that mothering I get to do for our new little guy).

So, folks, please bear with me. I’m still around and blogging, but if I don’t post quite as often for a short bit, assume it’s because I’m re-stuffing the cats’ stocking (again) or dealing with a couple of dogs who’ve eaten every last shard of glass from a broken cake platter. Cross your fingers that I actually will manage to get some down time so I can drink some Red Thai Chi Tea (say that 5 times fast!) with LT Fromage, open some gifts (if the dogs don’t get to them first) and read a good book or two.

Merry Christmas to you and yours from us and ours in the Fromage household!

All I Want For Christmas….

Looks like denim…. But feels like PJs! They’re Pajama Jeans!

https://www.pajamajeans.com/flare/next

Jeans that are pajamas? H3LL yeah! Sign me up! I like to be comfortable while looking sharp!

Am I ashamed of my desires? Perhaps slightly. But c’mon, it “Feels like sleepwear but looked too good to keep hidden under the covers”!

*Concern is on the rise that I may soon give in and purchase…a….snuggie. Someone stop me, I need an intervention!

Winner Winner, Chicken Dinner!

Congratulations to citymouse for winning the very first Lady Fromage give away! Get in touch with me so I can get your copy of The Rebel Housewife Rules out to you, I hope you enjoy it as much as I did!

(click her comment to visit her blog)

A consolation prize, to everyone who didn’t win: some yummy festive snacks. Some assembly required. (Pictures of the finished product can be found on this post)

Cranberry, Pistachio, Chocolate Cookies
Yummy to my tummy!

I’m actually not going to share the sugar cookie recipe I used, because it sucked. Use one you know and trust, or, go buy a roll at the grocery store. I promise it will be better than what I ended up with.

Oh so easy from here:

½ cup pistachios
½ cup dried cranberries
1/3 cup chocolate chips

Bake, and then gobble up with a cold glass of milk!

White Chocolate Peppermint Truffles

Now, you’ll have to bear with me again. I didn’t measure (This is why I cook, not bake)

Melt approximately 1 cup of white chocolate in a double boiler (Don’t have one? No biggie. Boil a small amount of water, and set another pot inside. You’re just keeping this treat off of direct heat).

Add a few crushed candy canes (I used a mortar and pestle, but a rolling pin and ziplock bag works nicely, too) and a half cup (or so...) of mini marshmallows.

Stir continually until the mix has set enough to scoop with a melon baller, shake some red sprinkles and enjoy!

Using the same theme, you can melt milk chocolate and add any of the following:

-Andes mints, sprinkle on imperials and dried mint as a finishing touch.
-Cinnamon and cyan pepper for a bit of bite!
-Orange extract (find it near the vanilla, and many more flavors are available) and zest fresh orange rind over the tops.

I also tried making eggnog truffles, but the ‘nog made them a little too sticky, more like a taffy. I would suggest skipping the liquid (unless you don't mind the mess!) and simply adding all spice to your white chocolate/marshmallow mix if you care to try them (they were pretty freakin’ dee-lish!)

Thanks to everyone who participated in the very first Lady Fromage give away! I had fun, I hope you did too, and we’ll be sure to do this again soon (And no, I don’t mean that the way a guy does after a mediocre date!)

Tips for a Successful Christmas Party: Army Style

Having a blast at my company's Christmas party in the photo booth on Friday night

Looking just as happy in the car after the Army party. Not because we were having fun. Because it was over.

A sign in roster as you enter the party doesn’t set the vibe “this is a fun, relaxed, enjoyable get together to celebrate the holiday”. It wasn’t a guest book. Don’t try to cover it up; we all knew what it was.

Don’t assign your guests blocks of time. Invitation should not read “Your hour is from 2-3pm”. You’ve got a massive house with plenty of room to accommodate everyone, and while we sure as H3LL didn’t want to stay even a whole hour, it would have been nice to not be kicked out when “our time was up”.

Speaking of invitations; e-vites are ok for, umh, like Girls Night Out or Super Bowl Parties, but not for your formal, brigade Christmas party. Tacky cheap A$$.

You may not want kids there, and hey, that’s ok, I wouldn’t either, but wording it this way: “No kids are allowed” is a little harsh. Especially when your freakin’ rugrats/devil spawn are running around screaming the whole time.

Dress blues (The Army version of a Tux)? Get serious. We had to get all dressed up for a stupid house party (where we could only stay 1 hour) in the middle of a Saturday afternoon? I wouldn’t show up in sweats, but formal wear was a little over the top.

Special note to the Commander’s Wife: Look, I’m face blind but even I don’t make my guests wear identification. You’re just lazy, bee-ach. With your scheduling, you shouldn’t have had more than half a dozen wives there at a time anyway. Instructing the men to “find the name tag that properly identifies your spouse” isn’t polite. On the plus side, at least we weren’t referred to as “dependants” for once.

Thank God for the after party. Casual dress, real food, lots of booze, music, beer pong and stick on mustaches. We did still use name tags, but we were more creative with things like “FUCK!NG Reindeer” or “Chief Elf”. No one was required to “properly identify their spouse” and you didn’t have to leave until you wanted to (which for us, was when I started throwing up in the yard).

These tips brought to you by a bitter Army Wife, who declines to properly identify herself at this time.

(Excuse the bitterness, a little bit of Grinch is emerging, but with the obligatory attendance to that so-called party in the past, my mood should lighten in no time!)

Be sure to check in tomorrow for the very first Lady Fromage GIVE AWAY!

Back in the Saddle Again

After a rough few days, I’m back at work. I prefer to use my sick days when I’m feeling good; D@MN having to use them (plus vacay time! eff!) for when I feel like crap.

In my down time, I did manage to Christmas-fy the Fromage Palace. Or, at least I’m off to a good start! (ETA for the tree is Sunday!)

The stockings are hung on the balcony with care. Except there is some sharing going on. The cats are sharing a big red paw, and all 5 rattinos will find a can of oysters in their community stocking (Otherwise, we’d need a much, much longer balcony!)

The cows are ready for Christmas (Oh, by the way, the dogs ATE ALL OF MY COW COOKIES. And broke my cake display. Notice Erika has a “naughty” stocking with a piece of coal attached.)

My grandfather’s antique box is filled with “snow” covered, cinnamon scented pine cones and LT Fromage’s beer steins are even in the spirt, donning a big red Santa hat.

The doorway is draped with snowflakes and lights,

And once you reach the kitchen, red and white flowers from LT Fromage, next to my Christmas candle sticks set the table for all the yummy snacks like....

White and milk chocolate dipped candy canes and pretzels

Sugar cookies loaded with pistachios, milk chocolate and dried cranberries

Spicy chocolate; white chocolate peppermint; mint chocolate and eggnog candies and truffles piled high on the tabled (and safely removed when we’re away and the dogs are inside!).

Recipes for these goodies to follow. Also, be on the lookout for the very first Lady Fromage give away!

Remember to follow me on Twitter for up to the minute, life shattering updates like “if I hear one more Taylor Swift song I'm going to shoot myself. Just putting that out there." Or the new Question of the day; today’s being: What part of the gingerbread man do you eat first? (Gini, get your mind out of the gutter! *wink wink*)

Livin’ the Dream

Some years ago, I purchased a cow shaped cookie cutter. If you don’t know it by now, I love cows. However, I don’t love cookies as much as I do cows, at least not sugar cookies (the only ones that really hold their shape. I tried making cow chocolate chip cookies…. Fail.) But last night, my dream became reality, we finally made cow cookies (and I didn’t burn the house down in the process!)!

I rolled out the dough, cut lots of little bovines and baked away until their little toes turned golden brown. Once they cooled, we iced. I even bought black decorating icing and those fancy little tips (which didn’t fit, by the way; we ended up squirting icing into sandwich bags and cutting the corner off. Resourcefulness: just one of my many gifts.) I even went so far as to buy little pearl sprinkles for eyes. Hardcore? Maybe; but I’ve been waiting for this day for quite some time.

LT Fromage decorated his cows with red and green spots, since he was in a festive mood (er, I was hogging the black icing).

Santa’s not the only one who likes cookies and milk, so when LT Fromage finished his snack we poured some leftover milk into a cat-sized mug for Toby, who sat on the cow rug and helped finish off dad’s drink. Before we finished up, we carefully made 5 dime-sized cookies for the rats (The Ladies). The dogs didn’t get to partake in the festivities. Sorry, guys.

Giant snowflakes and tiny twinkle lights are hanging and the garland, nativity and stockings will soon emerge too. Best of all? LT Fromage suggested we go pick out our tree… THIS WEEKEND. Shocked? You should be! This comes from the man who grew up in a family who was getting their pine on Christmas-freakin’-eve! I, the polar opposite, erected my fake greenery as early as November 1st when I was a single lady. I thought this gesture was a peace offering since I slept on the couch the night before, but in fact, it’s due to his work schedule; this being the only weekend we can go unless we want to pick up a scraggly tree a few days before the holiday. Whatever the reason, we get the tree this weekend, and I can’t wait!

And finally,

I started Twittering. Yeah, they got me. Be sure to follow me (on the side bar to your right) so you can get updates on my super exciting life every time anything semi-awesome happens. C’mon, you know you want to!

Host First Thanksgiving as LT and Lady Fromage: Check!

(Unattempted as of yet, but they look quite yummy! Check them out here!)

Phew! It’s over.

We actually had a great time, and I have to mention (rub in) again how lucky LT Fromage and I are to have in laws we love, who love each other! The food was great, the company even better, and by a miracle of God (or it might have been my momma) the house was sparkling clean when everyone left!

However, the stress of so much company, more cooking than we normally do in a month, constant entertaining and 3 dead car batteries (each family experienced it at different times, his, mine and ours) spread over the week has us a little on edge now. When I say a little on edge, I mean I slept on the couch last night. (Lesson learned: When LT Fromage is burnt out, he wants to be left alone, which conflicts with my need to draw close again. Ah, the discoveries of a young marriage. See, L, we aren’t perfect all the time!)

With thanksgiving out of the way, it’s time to start prepping for the most spectacular time of the year…. Christmas!

Stay tuned for cookie recipes (It’s true, I’m going to try my hand at baking once more!), darling home décor ideas and wish lists (listen up, Santa! Or blog readers in a giving mood!) In the mean time, be sure to check out Shutterfly, where you can score 50 free personalized Holiday greeting cards, with your photo! They also offer mugs, calendars and more. LT Fromage and I are totally doing it this year. Especially since we get them for free. Free is good. It means saving more money for the mega-electric bill we’ll get in January thanks to all the lights I’ll be attaching to the house.

I Paid for Services from a Woman on Craigslist

This Thanksgiving is gonna be uh-mazing.

3 years ago on this holiday LT Fromage asked my dad if he could marry me (Yeah, he’s totally such a gentleman! I’m a lucky lady, I know). I was uber nervous about that day, not because I knew he was gonna pop the question (to my dad… not me, yet. He waited until Christmas, but I’ll save that story for next month!) but because it was the first time we were introducing our parents to each other.

I had nightmares for months prior (I kid you not) about them hating each other. Most mornings I woke up when they started screaming at one another in the front yard.

That didn’t happen. Phew.

Actually, our folks loved each other!

I think we’re a pretty lucky couple. It’s hard enough to find someone you love enough to marry, a plus if you like their family, and even better if they like yours too. But for your original family and the new addition to get on so well… Well, that pretty much rocks. Jealous much? \

Sadly, our families like each other maybe a little too much.

This year LT Fromage and I are staying in the Little Apple for Turkey Day, so we planned to host one side of the family. Yes, only one side.

When it’s just LT Fromage and I in the house, it seems like a mansion with its 4 bedrooms and 2 bathrooms. If we throw in 4 parents, 4 siblings and a brother-in-law, plus their combined 3 dogs, well, the space would close in quickly. I’m not even sure we’d have enough hot water for everyone to shower on a daily basis. We couldn’t possibly invite them all, and in small print include “Daily shower not guaranteed”. So we didn’t. We picked the side that hadn’t yet been out to visit, and asked them to keep their travel plans quiet, which they did, but then this conversation happened.

Family 1: “So we were thinking, since the kids aren’t coming back for Thanksgiving, we should get together anyway! Would you guys join us?”

Family 2: “Uhm. Thank you so much! That sounds wonderful! I’m actually not sure what we’re doing quite yet… Can I confirm later this week?”

Family 2 to Fromages: “What do we tell them?!?”

What did we do? The only thing we could do, we invited everyone. All 9 of them (minus the dogs, we had to draw the line somewhere).

Of course, being fairly newlywed with no kids, we haven’t accumulated enough place settings, utensils or cookware for this situation. Solution: BYOP – Bring your own place setting. And forget sitting at the table, because it only seats 4. Hello, living room furniture! May you survive this day wearing no cranberry sauce.

This Thanksgiving, I’m thankful for my 2 families. 9 people who are stellar enough to come out early to help cook, bringing pots and pans and their own dishes and not their dogs. Above all, to be laid back enough to make this week a whole lot of fun instead of a headache.

(PS: Who wouldn’t stress about cleaning the house with all those people coming? I did myself a favor and hired a housekeeper. Best $67 I’ve ever spent on services provided by a woman I found on craigslist… Wait… That sounded really wrong…)

100 Things

I’m speechless (Not really. I’m never speechless), this is my 100th post. In honor of this mile stone, here are 100 things. Not really related things, funny or impressive things, but 100 things none the less.

My list of 100 things.

1. My highest score in solitaire is 735. Which is the highest possible score. NBD
2. I can reach 97 WPM with 97% accuracy
3. I can hold my breath for 1:14
4. Jolly Ranchers always give me hiccups
5. I love grilled cheese sandwiches with sliced jalapeños
6. Or onion and tomato
7. Or dipped in ranch dressing
8. Pretty much anything can be dipped in ranch dressing for that matter
9. I was home schooled until my senior year of high school
10. When I was a little girl, I had an imaginary friend, a horse named Acorn
11. I broke my left ring finger in high school and set it myself, it still bothers me when it’s cold out
12. I love Splenda
13. I add red pepper to hot chocolate, it’s so yummy
14. I’m terrified of earth worms
15. When I was little, I killed a butterfly in a jar using a cotton ball soaked in rubbing alcohol, even though my mom pleaded with me not to
16. I’ve had a stereo stolen from my car and my house broken into twice
17. I worked in an animal shelter where I had to euthanize peoples unwanted pets, I quit working there when I realized I had stopped feeling sad about them dying
18. Ringo is my favorite Beatle
19. I carry 3 types of anxiety medications at all times
20. I starred in the spring musical my senior year in high school (Once Upon A Mattress)
21. I was awarded “Most Improved Dancer” by the cast
22. My favorite color is green
23. I have prosopagnosa (face blindness)
24. I burp when I yawn
25. I read really, really fast
26. I’m not sure if I believe in ghosts, but I am sure that if they’re real, there are some in my house
27. My favorite number is 27
28. I always tip at least 20%
29. I have giant feet, some of my shoes are size 10 ½ wide
30. I had to buy men’s hiking boots because they don’t make women’s that fit me
31. I can’t hike anymore because of patella femoral syndrome in my right knee
32. I love cemeteries, I find them peaceful not creepy
33. However, I do have an abnormal fascination with death
34. I love the old Window’s Entertainment Pack with Chip’s Challenge, Rodent’s Revenge and Tetris
35. I hate the number 35
36. I bruise very easily. I’m afraid most people think LT Fromage must beat me at home
37. When I was little, I had a crush on the Nickelodeon cartoon character Doug
38. My favorite Starbucks drink is the pumpkin spice frappuccino, but when it’s out of season I order a caramel frappuccino with a half cream base
39. I have a paw print tattoo behind my right ear, in memory of all of my pets I’ve lost and the ones I’ve had to put down because there was no room left for another unwanted animal
40. I can fall asleep anywhere, any time. My parents used to think I had narcolepsy
41. I’m the oldest of 4 children, 2 of whom my parents adopted. I love my family so much
42. LT Fromage and I laugh all the time. I’ve never seen a couple who laughs so much and can be so silly, except maybe on TV
43. Last New Year’s Eve I caught our kitchen on fire making breakfast. The fire department had to come put it out
44. We now own a fire extinguisher
45. I love tanks and have a small collection of 1/144 scale miniatures
46. My favorite tank is the Stingray, but it was never mass produced
47. I’ve only been on public transportation once in my life and I was terrified
48. The Office is my favorite TV show
49. I’m also recently lovin’ Arrested Development
50. LT Fromage and I went to Sicily, Italy for our honeymoon, which was amazing except…
51. Our luggage was lost in Rome, so we didn’t have our things for the first day
52. Also, the water was out 50% of the time, so we only showered every other day
53. And we ended up sleeping on separate couches because the bed was so uncomfortable
54. I’m terrified of stopped school busses
55. I dated a guy who went to Annapolis, later married a man who graduated from West Point but was never involved with anyone from the Air Force Academy, despite living only an hour away, while the other schools are on the east coast
56. If while walking, an object is between me and my companion, I have to repeat the phrase “bread and butter” until we are no longer separated
57. I get nosebleeds when I’m nervous
58. I got two nosebleeds on our wedding day (one about 5 minutes before walking down the aisle. In my white dress. The second at the reception immediately before pictures)
59. I had nosebleeds all the time when we started getting frisky, which is a pretty good mood killer
60. I love diet Pepsi, but usually buy Sam’s Club brand diet soda. I won’t touch diet Coke with a 10 foot pole
61. Generations ago, my family owned the Coca Cola company
62. I once stole an Obama sign from a deli window and am guilty of removing an Obama bumper sticker in a parking lot on at least one occasion
63. I didn’t grow out of stuffed animals like my mom predicted I would. I still sleep with “Sir Loin”, a cow LT Fromage gave me for our first Christmas (He had no idea when he bought that cow that he’d be sleeping with it 3 years later)
64. I once ripped the seat of my pants dancing with my friend at a gay club
65. I also ripped the seat of my pants at a county fair while showing my dog
66. My current favorite pair of jeans are wearing thin in the bottom, so to prevent another rip I’ve duct taped them on the inside
67. I live by the phrase “If you can’t duck it, chuck it” (except sometimes I use another work that rhymes with duck)
68. The song “The Reason” by Hoopastank makes my ears hurt, much the same as nails on a chalk board does. Only worse
69. So does the sound of the new Sun Chips bag
70. I don’t believe in the territories
71. I also don’t believe in umami
72. I once cut off my own skin tag with nail clippers
73. I can’t swim
74. I had no idea it would be so hard to think of 100 things. Eff, what was I thinking?
75. My favorite color is green
76. I was raised Protestant, but converted a few years ago to Roman Catholic
77. I got to stay in a Monastery when I was in New York for LT Fromage’s graduation
78. At the present time LT Fromage and I own 2 dogs, 2 cats, 4 rats and a frog
79. Our older cat can sit, speak and roll over, the younger can speak and sit up to beg
80. I own and can shoot, disassemble, clean and reassemble my own gun (Ruger SR9c)
81. T-Rex is my favorite dinosaur
82. If it was socially acceptable, I would totally hole up in the house and never come out. Except to pick up an order of green curry (to go, of course) once in a while
83. I have to sleep with one leg out of the covers
84. I love stadium nachos and M&Ms. Yes, together
85. Blue M&Ms are my favorite, even though I think the Red M&M on the commercials is the best
86. My current favorite commercial is the Geico “Bird in the Hand” one
87. Or maybe the Skittles Tube Sock
88. Or the shake weight, because that is too crazy funny, and not on purpose
89. My birthday sometimes falls on national donut day, which is great, because I love donuts
90. I also love cheese, anything to do with cheese, and also green curry
91. I’ve read my favorite book, Life of Pi at least a dozen times
92. I basically live in my “Nothing Tips Like A Cow” hooded sweater
93. I’ve got a space heater with a remote, it’s set up so that I can turn it on to heat the bathroom before I even get out of bed in the morning
94. I’m a die-hard Colorado Rockies fan
95. I love cooking
96. But I can’t bake and always end up frustrated when I try
97. I live for Christmas and, before I was married, would bring out my (artificial) tree on November 1st
98. Now we wait until the first day of Advent and buy a real tree
99. I love antique stores
100. I hate funnel cake

The Answers You’ve Been Waiting For

I’m sure you all spent the last 72 hours wondering “Are kids more frightened of the Easter Bunny than the bear suit?” and “How many trick-or-treaters will she have?” (Yeah, right. I hope you had better things to do than think of me in a bunny suit.)

The wait is over. Here’s what went down.


The bunny suit, which was definitely an Easter bunny, by the way, even without the vest, is much less threatening to kiddos than the brown bear suit that I wore when I worked for the bank. I did still manage to make a few kids cry, but more often than not, they wanted a picture or a hug.


*Besides the warm fuzzy feeling I got in my heart from making all those children smile, there was a very, very warm feeling inside that suit for the 3 freakin’ hours I was trapped inside of it. I’m pretty sure I sweated off like 20 pounds. I rewarded myself with a to-go order of green curry on the way home though, so it was totally worth it.

Due largely to the fact that I purchased a minimal amount of candy, namely kinds that I would like to eat myself, we had a multitude of costumed trick-or-treaters come to our door. Eff. I actually had to resort to handing out left over Twizzlers from last year. I hope those were still ok… It was that or pennies. I know the Twizzlers, even if stale, would taste better than a dirty old coin.

LT Fromage and I did not wear our pirate costumes on Saturday. After spending the prior evening as the White Rabbit, AKA Eater Bunny, I was costumed out. My friend S and I did end up dressing in the same outfit (Dark jeans, black heels, black t-shirt) so we decided we were going as each other. We had a fun time, even though we only stayed out until about quarter after midnight. Look, people. I’m old. I am now in the 25-34 age bracket, I can’t be stayin’ out all night anymore. I should have been at home doing a cross word puzzle or something.

And the ultimate weekend highlight….

Hearing Joey Lawrence on the 90’s Hits Station on XM Radio on Sunday afternoon.

I immediately had to text my sister “oooommmgg! Remember how crazy we used to be about him? What the H3LL were we thinking back then?” But then again, I was tuned into the 90’s hits that afternoon and I actually listened to the whole song, so maybe I haven’t come as far as I thought….

I Used to Dance on the Street Corner...

I’m slightly embarrassed to admit LT Fromage and I may be going out this weekend. Part of me cries “Seriously! We are so too old for this…” but then the other part of me, the decision making part, says “Then what the hell did we buy those pirate costumes for?” We will not be tromping around door-to-door with pillow cases, however. We will be celebrating in the more adult fashion, like, at the bar. And then, on Sunday night we’ll be really adult and hand out candy to the neighbors’ kids. Last year we spend something like $796 dollars on candy (slight exaggeration) and had something like half a dozen costumed kids show up. We ate most of it, but our orange pumpkin bowl is still full of treats, the picked over ones, of course; I think there’s only Twizzlers and Pixy Stix left. I actually quite enjoy the latter, but they are likely not very good 12 months after the purchase date…

This year, I picked up a bag of peanut M&Ms (funny story about those….*), Reeses and Kit Kats. Also some hokey chocolate balls with eye ball wrappers and chocolate coins with pumpkin wrappers. Basically, things that, if not sought after by 9-year-olds, will be enjoyed by LT Fromage and myself. Mostly myself. Especially the Reeses. Which I may or may not have been snacking on….

*When I was a very little Fromage, my grandma gave me my first peanut M&Ms, until that time I’d only ever seen the standard ones. My family thought I must not like the peanuts, since I was sucking all of the chocolate off and leaving the filler in a pile. When questioned, I explained, “I’m saving the seeds so I can plant an M&M tree!” Smart kid, that little Lady Fromage….

To prepare myself for donning a costume this Saturday night, I’ve volunteered to spend this evening dressed as a white rabbit at my company’s Fun House. The theme, I’m told, is Alice in Wonderland. However, the box depicts the rabbit suit in a pastel vest and a few décor items that have passed by so far have been in the same Easter colors. Either someone has their holidays mixed up or we’re going extremely low budget and reusing supplies from this spring. Regardless, I’ll be hiding under a giant furry bunny costume, which thank God, hides my face.

This will not be my first appearance in an animal costume. I have experience as a brown bear, advertizing for Bank of the West. Sometimes I danced on the street corner with a “Free Checking” sign. Less often, but much preferred to dancing on the corner (The ONLY experience I have doing anything from a street corner…), I attended events where the majority of children were terrified instead of entertained. I imagine a 5’6” rodent in a vest will be less threatening than the bear, but I won’t know for a few hours yet. I’ll let you know on Monday