(*It’s not that he’s doing a poor job as commander; but LT Fromage is just that – a LT (Lieutenant) and the commander’s job is generally held by a Captain. He was picked to fill the spot while it was open, but now he’s got to hand it over and take some kind of staff job.)
Moving on, Thursday night there was another one of those lovely Senior Wives Coffees (Not because I’m a actually a senior, thought LT Fromage likes to joke that I am; I was invited because he is a Senior Leader and I am his wife).
I need to make something clear before I start; this is not the Family Readiness Group (FRG), which is a support system for ALL soldiers’ families. I see the need for that. No, this is a social group for only the higher-ups’ wives.
I would also like to point out that not all Army Wives are stupid. I have some awesome Non-Sucky Army Wife friends, it's just that there are a lot of Sucky Army Wives out there, and they're much more interesting to talk about. If you take a look at the post, "Real Army Wives", we're primarily talking about group B here today, "Wearing Your Husband's Rank", and the women who enjoy doing so.
Anyway. Back to the coffees.
Have I mentioned how much I hate these things? I hate them. I loathe any kind of “mandatory shoulder rubbing”, especially when it’s a group of women who have nothing in common except that their husband’s happen to work together. No one else does this! There are no groups for Accountants’ Wives or Firemans’ Spouse clubs! I wouldn’t go except that my involvement (or lack of) reflects back on LT Fromage. The things we do for love.
So, if you don’t mind, I’d like to take a moment to address the “charming” group of women with whom I am obligated to socialize and whose company I am expected to pretend I enjoy:
Dear Sucky Army Wives,
I think it’s great that your husband graduated college and now leads America’s finest into battle to protect our country. Yep, they sure do work hard; they’re an impressive group of men. But guess what:
You didn’t do anything! Most of you are umemployed, stuck up, bossy and overweight. Get over yourselves. Quit looking down your nose at everyone, the only impressive thing you did was marry an officer. Get off the couch, get your own college degree or hold down your own job and then maybe I’ll give a $H!T. For Christ’s sake, I’ll applaud anything that required more effort than watching daytime TV 40 hours a week.
Especially LT Fromage’s boss’s wife. Get your kids under control and quit being a bee-ach. You suck and your husband is an idiot.
(I hope the tiny italic font indicated that I said that part quietly and quickly!)