Monday, February 22, 2010

Spider Face

While Christmas shopping with my hubby, I made a comment about "intensive purposes" and my husband looked at me like I had 3 heads. He asked me to repeat myself, which I did. When he finally finished laughing, (it was a while!) he told me what it REALLY is.

“For all intents and purposes”

I've been saying this wrong my whole life.

Before I go any further, let me mention that I am a smart person. I’m not a genius, I’m not sure I’d even say I’m much above average, I’m not tooting my own horn here, ok? But I’m smart. I had a 4.0 student all through high school, and left college with a 3.92 GPA. When I say I left college, I didn’t drop out of college because it was too hard; it was because the accreditation was being revoked. I felt I could do better things with my time than earn a degree that didn’t mean anything, especially in a field I had learned I didn’t like anyway. I should have gone to another school, I didn’t. I do plan to get my degree but next time, in a different field and from an accredited school.

That being said, there are many other things hubby has lovingly pointed out about my speech.
The way I singularize and pluralize things, as in, “would you like a gum?” or “I have a water in my eye”. He also makes me repeat myself, so he can hear me ask again for “a fig NEWton”. To make the sound of a chicken, I whisper “chicken, chicken, chicken,” I’m not sure why. I just do. I’ll never live down the time I tried to look up the weather in Cario, but couldn’t find it because I spelled it “Kyro”.

I’m so glad I have a hubby who loves me enough to catch those sorts of things, so that I don’t have to spend the next 24 years continuing to say “Intensive purposes”. Thank you, “Doctor Scholl”!

I’d like to close with a quote from The Office, which I feel is appropriate for the post:

Jim Halpert: Several times a day, Michael says words that are Way beyond my vocabulary--
Michael Scott: I know where this is going!
Jim Halpert: Do ya?
Michael Scott: No.
Jim Halpert: Ok. Remember spiderface?
Michael Scott: No.
Jim Halpert: Ok because the quote was, "cut off her nose to spiderface."

Season 5, "Stress Relief"

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Do I need to be liked? Absolutely not. I like to be liked. I enjoy being liked. I have to be liked. But it's not like this, compulsive, need, to be liked. Like my need to be praised. - Michael Scott, "The Office"

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