Why am I soft in the middle when the rest of my life is so hard

The other day I felt it was necessary to apologize to CPT Fromage for my choice in music. Not because we have to like all of the same tunes, but because it was 7AM and I was on the 5th repeat, at full volume, of “Break My Stride”. To me, this is a fabulous way to start the morning, but CPT Fromage isn’t as into 80’s music, so I’m fairly certain this was equivalent to waterboarding or some other form of torture to him. Trying to be a good wife, I put on some mutually enjoyed bluegrass over breakfast, but was jamming out again as soon as the door closed behind him. (And now I’ve had to go que it up for another listen since I’m talking about it! “Oh! Ain’t nothin’ gonna break-a my stride, nobody gonna slow me down, oh no! I got to keep on movin’!”)

I love 80’s music. Billy Joel, Paul Simon, Eric Carmen and Howard Jones… Those guys get some serious play time on my iTunes. No ZZ Top or Aerosmith songs have a home on my playlist, nope, I like the more terrible stuff. Ashamed to admit this? I am not.

So this morning, as per the usual, I was rocking out to the 80’s on VH1 when the video for “You Can Call Me Al” came on. Seriously? How have I not seen this in my nearly 27 years of life? (*Pausing Matthew Wilder to pull up the Paul Simon video*)

I have to assume everyone else in the music listening world has enjoyed this terribleness already, but in case you have missed out, or just want to subject yourself to it once more… (Once more won’t kill you… I’ve played it at least a dozen times.)

Old Ladies Rock

Sawing Logs

First of all, thanks for the congrats! It’s nice to know I’ve still got a few readers out there!

Now, on to today's post…

I have one super-sexy quality: I snore. Don’t hate, not everyone can be this awesome.
I’ve always been a snorer, my younger sister used to claim I’d kept her up at night in our shared room. Later in life, roommates would pick on my loud Zs. But apparently, according to CPT Fromage, I “never used to snore before we got married” I tell him I just kept a lid on it long enough to snag him, but he’s trapped now, so let the fun resume! The snores are back in full force these days, sometimes so loud and violent (can snores be violent?) that I wake myself up!

In some instances, my snoring can be more embarrassing than others… Like when I let ‘em rip at the couples’ massage CPT Fromage and I treated ourselves to for Valentine’s Day. Look, rub my feet and calves and I’m out. I can’t help it!

Don’t worry too much for CPT Fromage because I am not only a super-sexy-snoring wife, but also a super thoughtful one, so I spend a lot of money on Breathe Right Strips. These things make me even sexier (can it be so?), even though they don’t totally eliminate my sound of sleep. I know that when my gentle snores wake CPT Fromage in the dead of night, he must roll over and gaze lovingly upon his resting wife… My hair a mess, raccoon eyes from unremoved eyeliner and a plastic strip across my nose; I know what he’s thinking: “I’m one lucky guy”. Or maybe he’s contemplating smothering me with a pillow, who knows.

Sometimes my snoring is a good weapon to have in my arsenal. When CPT Fromage and I have a lover’s quarrel near bedtime I have this up my sleeve…

“Yeah, well, I’m going to take off my Breathe Right Strip tonight!”

Although it would probably be more effective if I wasn’t shouting it from downstairs on the couch.

Good Things Come In 3s

Right? Isn’t that how it goes? Everything in 3s? I hope so because so far we have…

1. LT Fromage’s acceptance notice *

2. Some other really good news with a potentially freakin’ awesome outcome… but I’m not at liberty to talk about it. Soo…. Just know that we’re uber excited about something else around here!

3. And 3? Well, we’ll see!

Honestly, I’m so excited about items 1 and 2 I don’t even care what 3 is. I’m also so excited I’m having a hard time composing a coherent post. Bear with me.

* In addition to LT Fromage landing his dream job, he also gets to come home early from deployment to start his training. When I say early, I mean in a few months – long before he was even due home for mid-tour leave!

Talk about MEGA NEWS! I wasn’t expecting this man home until at least September, and that would be for a mere 2 weeks! I’m like a kid at Christmas, folks. Seriously, I’m giddy. And I’ve never used that word before.

Of course, LT Fromage’s early return is a little of a trade-off. On the plus side: This 12-month deployment just got a hellavuh lot shorter, but on the downside: It means that in just a few months I’ll be leaving behind The Little Apple and all my friends here. We’ll also be leaving the dogs for an extended visit with their gramma, as we won’t be able to take them with us initially.

(Let me just say, I have the coolest mamma eva to take our 200lbs of dogs for the next 5-8 months. Thanks, mom! You rock my world!)

Finally, and possibly most importantly, we’ll be moving away from my Thia place. I warned LT Fromage that when the time came to choose Him or the Thai place, I wasn’t sure what I’d do. But he won out (He knew he would!)

So… yeah. Waiting for Good Thing Number 3 to come my way!

The Ultimate Trifecta

Well yesterday, I finally did it! Indian food for lunch (albeit from the frozen food aisle), green curry and a Diet Pepsi (Not even the generic brand!) for supper and Orange Leaf froyo for dessert! Then, I got to sit back and watch Big Love and bask in the awesomeness.

That is all.